Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Ephesians 4:2

Look the little tribe of Benjamin leads the way. Psalm 68:27

Our Family

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"In everything you do, put God first and He will direct you and crown your efforts with success."
Proverbs 3:6

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Overwhelmed....

Overwhelmed.
That is a good word for just how I feel. Over my miscarriage, over all of the support that y'all have provided, over how many of my friends have suffered through this & I have never known.
I am still a little weary but have been counseled by some wonderful, godly people.
I have a rock strong husband who has been such a God send through this.
I really just wanted to bang out my thoughts and feelings on my online "journal" here to let my emotions out. I never expected that so many people would read it and share their stories as well.
In wanting (but also not wanting to) remember this experience, I wanted to share just what was written to me. This will forever be part of me and I don't want to forget the people that wrapped their arms (literally, spiritually, and virtually around me.)

Dear Lord, I thank You for the difficult times in my life. Although they weren't easy, I can see how You worked through them. Help me to keep perspective on my problems today by remembering Your faithfulness in my past. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Michelle Rearick Ruiz....Thinking of during this difficult time. Hoping there is some comfort in your very near future. I promise the pain does go away, little by little, but you will never forget. Love you Jame!

Megan Davis Sokolowski .....I'm so sorry.


Tanya Gillespie-Stump I am so sorry for your loss Jamie..I know the words don't bring a whole lot of comfort right now..I myself went through the same thing two times in a row and it feels as though your heart is literally breaking. I will keep you in my thoughts and send prayers that the Good Lord holds you in his arms through this difficult time..you have a lot of friends to lean on for support..let them be your strength ♥
 
Cindy Roth Pielli..... You are in my thoughts and prayers! Hearing of your loss makes me remember my losses. God is good even in through the darkness. That was such a hard thing for me to grasp. I'm praying! Jamie Hilty Grafton...... Thinking of you and your family Jamie. I'm so sorry for your loss. Leanne Lyon Burns..... Hang in there Jamie; your body (and soul) need TIME---recovery and healing. Don't forget that it is a process and physiologically, your body needs a minimum of 6 months to get back to pre-levels. I can't comment on the soul-part (as far as time goes)...be good to yourself! Keep God close!


Courtney J White.... Jamie, I just scrolled through your page...my heart is so broken for you and your precious family....please know that I am joining together with everyone else to pray for you during this difficult time of loss...May God, the Father of all Comfort, warmly and richly rain down peace and hope upon your heart...





Jennifer Prosser-Isaacs..... I am soooo sorry Jamie:( Much love and prayers being thrown your way to help you get through this.....





Jessica Reeves Daily....... My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family Jamie. XOXOXO


Michelle Goertz Novak..... I'm so sorry for your loss. I pray that God would continue to grant you all peace and strength and that you would trully trust in Him and His plan. I love and miss you!


Jennifer Koch Hefner..... So sorry to hear the sad news, I also had a miscarriage in March. It's really hard, but I think everything happens for a reason. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.


Tiffany Barton..... I don't have the words, Jamie...I'm so very sorry for your loss! Please know you guys are in our thoughts and prayers!!


Jennifer Ayers Jones..... Jamie,

Just saw all that has been going on with you. Glad to hear that you are home and resting. Take it easy this holiday weekend and enjoy your time with your family coming in. You guys are in my thoughts and prayers. If you need anythng, just call!

Jennifer Foreman Kellum Just wanted you to know I am thinking about you. I had a bad feeling when I saw you at church on Saturday. I wish I would have said someting. You are a strong mommy to two babies on Earth and now one in heaven, whom you will meet again. Please let me know if there is anything you need.


Jillian Andrikanich .....Hi Jamie. Just wanted to let you know I was thinking about you. I'll keep you in my prayers and have faith that you'll feel better soon. You're an amazing mom and woman and I've seen that first hand. I wish you nothing but the best and hope your heart isn't so sad soon. :)


Cassie Blanchette ......just want you to know my heart is aching for you as I can relate to the pain for pregnancy loss as well. 3 months after I miscarried the Lord bleSsed us with our son, James. Know that you have an angel up in heaven waiting for you. It is a comfort to me. Love you. praying God's arms surround you.

Kiley Gearhart Yaracs... Aw, Jamie. I am very sorry to see this. It's actually making me cry! You will get through it but it's tough and not a day will go by that you don't think about what this little peanut could have been (I know from experience). Keep the Faith and stay positive! Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

Kelli Leighton Myers.... Hi jamie... Thinking of you and your family. I know how hard and how devestating it is. But just remember God has a will and way for everyone. Stay strong and keep Faith! ♥
Jamie Heider-Beach is very thankful for the kind health care professionals of the Camp Lejeune Naval Hospital. We are home and resting. Thank-you all for the prayers and messages. It is an overwhelming blessing to have such wonderful family & friends to rely upon.

Maureen Palmer Guarino please take care of yourself! thinking of you!

Kristin Hessemer Neagle I'm so sorry Jamie! You are all in my prayers! Everything happens for a reason and God wouldn't give you something you couldn't handle. Hope you get some rest!

Katie Hunt I'm so sorry to hear about this Jamie. I've been through it and everyone deals with it different. I'm praying for peace and understanding for you. I love you all.

Beth Sandidge Jaeger You are so strong! Love you!

Manda Panda Marie girl i'm clueless... but praying for you and your family! :) hugs

Rebecca Apetz Our prayers are with you guys.

Christina Rodes Davis Not sure what has happened, but I hope you and your family are ok and doing better, god bless.

.Lara Piedra Heath I don't know where I've been but I just read your wall. We are so sorry Beach Family :( You will all be in our prayers.

Valerie Schall Silvis Jamie, I am so sorry to hear about this. Thinking of you and your family!

Cara Young Materkowski so sorry about your loss thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

Kim Stielow u r loved!!!

Christa Smith Delgado Prayers for quick healing to your body and your heart.
Luann Williams So sorry for your loss Jamie. Will be thinking and praying for you and your family.


Rebecca Adair Hey girl, just wanted to tell you I'm praying for you this morning! Praying that you feel the Lord's comforting arms around you. Love you!!!


Melinda Horton Peace Praying for you Jamie. I'm so sorry for your loss. I know the heartache you are experiencing all too well and I pray that it is healed quickly.


Bess Henninger Warren Jamie, I'm just reading what you are going through. I am very touched by your faith at this hard time. I just want you to know that I'm thinking of you, and I shed a tear reading your story. I will pray that God holds you in his arms extra tight right now. You are such a positive force on facebook, just like you are in real life!


Nancy Blake King Praying for you and your family...I have been there. Hard to cope with and always a loss, but knowing when I make my final trip I will have a sweet baby is what I look forward too.


Tracy Salter Leary Hugs and prayers sweet girl! Praying you through this morning.


Lori Wiseman Coleman Thinking of you!! we love you and your family hugs from us
Jessica Ball Spencer im so sorry for your loss..you guys will be in our thoughts and prayers

Laura Swann-Ritchie I am sure no words I can say will make you guys feel any better, but please know that I am so very sorry for what might have been and I am praying for you, Ben, and the kids....Love to you all....

April Dunmire The only words of comfort I can bring you are the words of Jesus, "Suffer all the little children come unto me." GOD is holding your little one in the palm of HIS hand, and has you wrapped in HIS loving embrace. PEACE be upon you.

Susan Kubancsek Stone We are very sorry for your loss.

Lisa Reinke Jamie, I am so sorry...

Christina Sims Reeve Im so sorry Jamie. I know how you feel. We suffered a miscarriage a little over a year ago. I always think about what could have been/should have been. I just keep telling myself..everything happens for a reason..........it does get better, but it never goes away.

Michelle Rearick Ruiz Aww.. :(

Jennifer Pelletier I'm so sorry, Jamie. I, too, have been there. Give yourself the time to grieve. It is a process, but you have God as your help and strength. I'm praying for you and your family. ((hugs))

Keri Blanton Jamie, I'm so sorry for your loss. It is emotional roller coaster, the joy of finding out your pregnant, than the great sadness of miscarriage. I misscarried about a year before Lily was born. Give yourself some time to grieve and know that God is with you as well as your friends. I'm praying for you and your family!!!

Cathi Bouzide So sorry Jamie.

.Rebecca Mullins So sorry for your loss. Love you!

.Beth Heider Hickman Jamie so sorry for your loss and I know that there are no words to express what you are going through but I am praying for you & your family.

Melissa Townsend-Fisher Your family will be in my prayers. Word and prayers are the only comfort I can give, but we know the Lord is the greatest peace.

Roni Hutcheson Richards Love you...


Julie Wolfgang Sabella im so sorry Jamie...just had my second in 2 years....God is good...He needs angels for greater purposes... Someday we will see all of the "why's"...luv U!

Rebecca Apetz Jamie I have been thinking of you non stop since I saw you yesterday. You are an amazing and strong woman. Remember if you need anything just call.

.Arinn Roy so sorry jamie. i've been there, and it's not easy. hugs.

.Ashley Huber Hugs ur way.

Heather Fox Slusher I'm so sorry to hear this. Your friends, family and faith will get you through. Thinking of you!!

Anne 'Miller' Burley My first baby, Lemuel Konnor, was born in heaven November 20, 2005 and July 13, 2006 will always live in infamy, as well as Cecilia Leilani in heaven May 9, 2008. December 16, 2008 was supposed to be her greeting to the world. Tears well up when I read your blog. I know the pain and heartache. I've walked a hard road to get to where I am now. Grieve, cry out, and ask why, but know that through it all you will hold your little one in heaven. God's just holding him/her until you come, and HE is holding you too.

Alison Bakner Johnston I've been there, between Nick & Adam. I found out I was preg at 6 weeks and lost the baby at 10 weeks. What a roller coaster!! I do understand. It will be ok. I'm here if you have questions or want to tallk!

Sharon McKeeman So sorry for your pain and loss. I know all those verses well they are the only thing that kept me going. God is so very good and I know He will hold your heart and comfort you as He also holds your precious baby. We have such a treasure in heaven and they will all be buddies before we get there:) there will be times it just hurts though and none of that makes it better, just keep holding on to God because He loves you even when things don't make sense. We are praying for you all!

.Sharon McKeeman And please don't even think the what ifs - my pastor told me to shut them off because they lead nowhere good and they aren't true! Gods plans can't be thwarted and His purpose for your child is being accomplished even if it doesn't look like what we would hope for. Just keep trusting His plan and His timing, it will all make sense one day and you are an AMAZING mother of three beautiful children!!!

Joyce Bashline Corbin Im sorry to hear that Jamie...but God always has a plan. He will take care of you during this hard time. :(

Megan Sanders I'm so sorry Jamie! My prayers are with you!

Laura Tamarelli I'm so sorry Jamie. My heart and prayers go out to you and your wonderful family.

Kristine Gregoli Betancourt oh, jamie! Im so sorry!

Kathy Houston Heider Sorry to hear of your loss. I'm sure Kendall was devastated. We will be keeping you and your family in our thoughts.

Karen Kirst Vyskocil so sorry, Jamie! praying for you all

Cindy Heider Murphy My heart hurts for you. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Jennifer Windley Meyers Oh Jamie! My heart is so sad for you guys. We'll be praying for you all. I hope God will bless you with another baby soon.

Christa Hood Jamie, I am so sad for you guys. May God comfort you in this time.

Lori Weldon Lucas Thinking of you guys. So sorry. ♥

Jennifer Washer Webb I'm so sorry to hear that. Our prayers are with you. Hugs.

Kara Beth Serra So sorry sweet girl... Hugs & prayers..

Ellen Keeney Feeko So sorry to hear that. You and your family are in our prayers.

Jamie Heider-Beach Thank you guys so much. I sat and read these over and over again while I was waiting in the doctor's office this morning. Love you guys.

Katelynn Bourget I'm sorry jamie for your loss. God is looking over you and he needed an angel. Praying for you and your family

Whitney Miller Grant Thinking of you guys..... :)

Karen Casciani I'm sorry to hear that Jamie, may peace be with you.

Shellie Schwalbe Olson Jaime, I just found out last night about your miscarriage, and I was so sorry to hear that. I had pone 27 years ago, and it still makes me sad to think about it. It had a profound affect on me. A nurse friend said she found that women reacted two ways, took it to heart, or accepted it immediately and moved on. I grieved for quite a while myself. I am praying you will take it easy to physically heal, and spend time with Him to heal in your heart.  (Shellie)
Troy Anna Smith Hey Jamie!

I just wanted to let you know that you have been on my mind and in my prayers all week. I am so sorry for your loss and needed to tell you that you are a very special person to so many people - and even though sometimes God can leave us confused to why this is His plan for us, we must trust in Him and believe we never struggle alone, He is right by your side. You are so loved and please know you are on my heart this holiday! xoxoxo
Nina Peters
Dear Jamie,
I didn't feel right posting this to your wall. I can't pretend to know what you are going through. I'm sorry this happened to your family. Isn't it something how fast we begin to think of them as our baby, as our family. It doesn't matter how far along you are or how long you've known...there is a connection there. Please know that I am praying for you and your family. If you ever need to talk,I'll listen. I can't give advice, but I'll let you chew my ear.
Open your Bible sweet lady. I usually just open the Bible and read whatever page I opened to. It works for me. I don't know why.
Love,
Nina

Jennifer Koval
Jamie I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am for your loss. There really are no words to say to make the situation any less painful, but believe me I do understand what you are going through. I have had 3 miscarriages so far. 2 before I had Landon & 1 after him. They are the most painful losses I have ever experienced & I pray everyday that it doesn't happen again. You & your family are in my thoughts & prayers. I know you have tons of family & friends that love you, but if you ever need ANYTHING at all please don't hesitate to call me! Hang in there sweetie.
Love,

Jennifer
Heather Fleming
Hey girl! I just want to let you know that I am praying for you. I understand so much of how you are feeling right now and I am very very sad for you. Please let me know if I can do anything for you and your family. Also, if you are feeling very mad, bitter, hurt, and sad it is ok to feel that way. It is also ok to let God know how you feel. This was what one of the older ladies in our church told me while I was still trying to recover this last time. I spent days of praying, writing, and studying the Bible (Psalms helped so much)The Lord is caring for 5 of my children right now until I make it to them someday. Just know that your baby is in great hands! Lots of hugs!!!!!!
Beth Scott Hornsby
Hi Jamie,

I saw the overwhelming love for what you recently went through and got curious to see what happened. I wanted you to know that my heart is with you too. I've had 3 miscarriages (one at 12 wks, 2 wks and at 3 wks) so I share your pain. I realize that I'm terribly overprotective with my sweet boys now, but I cherish them so much after finally receiving both of my blessings! Much love to you and I'll keep prayers of strength for you on my heart.
Hugs,

Beth

Christina Ulmer Winton
I wanted to write you as soon as I saw your post but I knew after I started to read and saw what happened I teared up and chose to wait until I could sit and give you 100% attion and my kids were aslee.... I wanted you to know how sorry I am that you are going through this and that I am praying for you; for a peace that passes all understanding... I will never tell someone I know how you feel...because I don't know what is going through your mind at this point but I can honestly say I have been through this tuff road before I lost 3 pregancy and I lost Zoe's twin, the day after the ball where I had told everyone we were expecting twins again I thought I was safe at 15 weeks... the pain is something that will always be there but never something that God can't help you through don't push the feelings away feel them greif is ment to happen.

I wish I could give you a hug I knew as they were telling me I had lost my first baby I could not really hear the doctor he was talking but I was in my head screaming at him just as you were asking why... and what had I done wrong... and I don't think those are questions that are ever answered. Some people may try to "help" and it hurts the most common hurts for me were ..."be thankful for the babies you have at home already you have them" (yes I do but I still love the baby that is being lost) "it's for the best, there was probably something wrong with the baby..." (not that this will happen, but people often say this stupid thing) or "you'll have other babies." That devalues this baby. Some people just don't know what to say and it comes out bad.

I wish there were some perfect words I could speek of healing for your heart and your soul but I do know that you have a wonderful husband and one amazing faith in GOD and that will help you through this more then you know... Please know I am here if you ever want to chat if you need to cry or scream or get mad at the world its all ok too my cell phone has not changed either!

"Come to me all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." (Matthew 11:28-29)
"Your righteousness reaches to the skies, O God, you who have done great things, who, O God is like you? Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honor and comfort me once again." (Psalm 71:19-21)

here is a wonderful supoort site and it is christian based.

http://www.mend.org/support/render.asp?content=home

Much love and lots of PRAYERS
Christina

Elizabeth Elizondo



Hi Jamie, I just saw your facebook post about your sweet baby. Oh Jamie, I'm so sorry. I pray that you feel the Lord's hands holding you right now. I pray for physical and emotional healing for you too. I don't know if you're familiar with the group Watermark? They wrote a beautiful song called Glory Baby when they lost their baby. Here's a link for the lyrics. (I don't know how to get the music to come up.) I will keep you in my prayers, Jamie. Love, Liz

Kim Stielow


i am so sorry- i know exactly what you are going thru- i lost a baby when Jon was in Iraq same time of year almost to the date- in 2007. I know it is so soon to think positivley but the most beautiful thing I know about my child is that they will only ever know the unconditional love of GOD- how amazing is that. My prayers are with alll of you, much love and peace from me and Emma

Nicole Farber Hungate


Hi Jamie,

I wanted to let you know that I have been praying for you since Thursday when Janet texted me. She said that you thought you were having trouble with your pregnancy. I wasn't sure of what happened until I saw you yesterday and you said you were okay but didn't want to be at the craft fair. I am so sorry for your loss. I regret that I didn't handle our conversation with more grace. I was stunned. I had no words, only tears that I didn't want to let fall in that setting. I wanted to reach out and hug you, but also not wanting you to lose the great composure you had at the time.

I love you and pray that your body and heart heals. Let yourself grieve and know that God has you firmly in His grasp.

Love, nicole

Stephanie Karl Gunesch
Jamie,

I'm so sorry to hear your hard news! I'll be praying that God brings you peace in the coming days. I cannot imagine a loss like that.

Love,
♥ Steph

Clara Sharp


You are definitely in my prayers.

Aww Jamie my thoughts are with you and the family, i know what you are going though I don't tell people but in Jan of this year I had 4 test say we were having a baby and then a 2 weeks later nothing. I know how you feel and know that this to shall pass and it will take some time but you will be at peace with it one day
Kayla Leonard November 21 at 6:54am Report


Hey i'm so very sorry that you had that happen :( i cant imagine having that exciting phase of planing and hopeing for a new little one taken away from you so suddenly... I hope you guys do have another one because your family is such a delight to be around and your children are absolutely beautiful and so sweet. Everything will come together and i'm sure you'll get pregnant again, i know it dosent take the sting out of what happened but everything will turn out how it should :) good luck on the baby making(lol) and maybe just maybe you might have a christmas surprise... Have a good day jamie :) (meagan)

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Thanksgiving Feast at St. Anne's


Fun in the leaves after the Thanksgiving Feast at Kendall & Isaac's school

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Monday, November 22, 2010

Never Alone

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Sunday, November 21, 2010

My emotions rubbed raw......

Tuesday, November 9th, 2010
We were absolutely elated to find out we were pregnant with our third child. Kendall was beyond excited & got to tell her daddy, grandparents, aunts/uncles the big news.
November 18, 2010
My world shattered.
How could someone I have only known for 9 days affect me so much?
Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. Before you were born, I set you apart for my holy purpose.
Jeremiah 1:5

Every good gift & every perfect gift is from above.
James 1:17

Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;



you formed me in my mother's womb.


I thank you, High God—you're breathtaking!


Body and soul, I am marvelously made!


I worship in adoration—what a creation!


You know me inside and out,


you know every bone in my body;


You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,


how I was sculpted from nothing into something.


Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;


all the stages of my life were spread out before you,


The days of my life all prepared


before I'd even lived one day.
Psalm 139:13-16 

I woke up to abdominal and back cramps plus bleeding. We immediately left to go to the ER even though in my heart I knew that there was nothing that could be done.
The nurse was kind, she offered statistics on how every 1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage. What I wanted to do was shout "I don't care.....this is my baby not a stat."
She told me that it was nothing I did that it was a natural process. My heart & head were screaming WHAT IF.....
WHAT IF
it was the traffic accident I had 6 days earlier
WHAT IF
it was the furniture that I moved
WHAT IF........
He or She only looked like this.......



But in my eyes I already was envisioning whether or not the baby would look like my two sweet children. How we were going to rearrange furniture to fit all 3 of them in our home. What I could sew & make special for this baby. That I was looking forward to once again feeling a baby move, kick, and share my body one last time.
A friend sent me this.....
I will rejoice over Jerusalem and take delight in my people; the sound of weeping and of crying will be heard in it no more. Never again will there be in it an infant who lives but a few days, or an old man who does not live out his years…”. Isaiah 65:19


It helped soothe my soul for a little bit. But I know in my heart that I will always remember
November 18, 2010
and
July 16,2011
when our sweet little love was due.
So for now......
we will be planting some tulip bulbs that my sweet friend, Star, gave to me. They will not look like much now but come spring I know that they will be beautiful & give me a little hope. A little glimpse of the beauty that this little one is bringing into our lives.
He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.

Revelation 21:4

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A little peak at the kids for the grandparents

Just when I think they are up to no good......
I find them cuddling in bed watching Dino Dan.
I love these precious little ones.
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Pictures of my booth for the craft show

Thank-you to all my family & friends for all the well wishes. The first day of the craft fair was a smashing success! I thought you guys might get a kick out of seeing my booth and what I have been doing!
It was also super fun to meet a local gal that follows my blog. It kind of made me feel like a superstar for 1 minute :)
I am back again today for day #2 then I promise I will get back to some normal blogging!




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Camp Lejeune Holiday Craft Fair....Last Day to shop :)

Come check out Skidz Wife Creations in the Carolina room. (Not local? Check us out on
or
or

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Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Ben's first half-Ironman

Ben had his first half-ironman on Saturday in Wilmington, NC. It is called the beach to battleship. (The race starts at Wrightsville beach and ends at the battleship North Carolina.)
For those of you not familiar with these races, a half-ironman entails a 1.2 mile swim, 56 mile bike, & a 13.1 mile run.
Ben completed his in 5 hours and 10 minutes.
He was 42/661 overall; 40/441 men; and 5th in his age group. What an achievement!
He trained very hard and had great partners who also did awesome in the race!
Dan Evans, Ben, Aaron Reilly

Family pic after the race!

Add caption

The kids waiting to cheer daddy on!
Finishing the bike!
WHOOP!


Starting the run

100 yards to the finish!

In the finish chute

Great job Love!
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Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Happy Birthday Marines! (A walk down my memory lane with my Marine!)

2010
2009

2008
2007
2007

2007

2005

2005

2004

2004



2003

2003

2003
When I became a Marine Corps spouse

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Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Monday Mugs (Best Friends) /Mamarazi/Top 2 Tuesday (thankful for)

A godly husband , who is my best friend

A beautiful little girl to love and care for

2 kiddos who love to be snuggled

A husband who serves this great nation





Mamarazzi Monday


Today is Top 2 Things you are thankful for....

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Monday, November 8, 2010

Marriage Monday, His Wife, What to do when life hurts


Getting Away
The writer of Proverbs urges us to, "Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well," (Prov. 5:15) encouraging us to enjoy our own spouse, instead of sharing ourselves in physical and emotional intimacy with anyone else.


The reality is, sometimes it's hard to get to the cistern! A man could die of thirst waiting for the crowds to disperse around his own cistern. We have to clear the way in our lives, so we can enjoy the closeness of our marriage partner. Kids a problem? Going away together to nurture your closeness can be one of the best things you can do for those kids. Don't let that stop you.

Join Julie at http://comehaveapeace.blogspot.com/ for more
_____________________________________________________
I had to share the ENTIRE article that I found at http://www.wivesoffaith.org/ I hope that you use it as much as I have been trying to.
His Wife
In this chapter we are going to be talking about the wife–YOU. Without learning about ourselves first, we cannot effectively learn how to pray for our husbands. We will talk about how to change ourselves first before trying to change our husbands, creating a home, respecting our husbands, and much more!


The Bible has a verse that talks about taking care of our own personal problems first before we try to everyone else’s. It says,

“And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye? Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.“ -Matthew 7:3-5

Before we judge our husbands for all the things we think they do wrong, we need to search our own hearts before God, and ask for forgiveness for the things that we have done wrong. We need to change what is wrong in our lives instead of trying to change our husbands. We need a pure heart before God, so that we can come to Him in prayer and He will listen. “The hard part about being a praying wife, other than the sacrifice of time, is maintaining a pure heart. It must be clean before God in order to see good results. If you have resentment, anger, unforgiveness, or an ungodly attitude, even if there’s a good reason for it, you’ll have a difficult time seeing answers to your prayers. Sometimes wives sabotage their own prayers because they don’t pray them from a right heart.” No one is perfect, but we can come to God with pure intentions and a pure heart. God knows our hearts better than anyone else, and He knows if it is pure or if we have bad intentions. When God sees that we want to do right and have the right attitude He will honor that.

Who, Me?… Change?

The thing about praying for our husband is that we expect change. Maybe we want our husbands to change or maybe a certain situation he is in to change, but the only change we can expect in the beginning is from ourselves. Me? You ask. Yes, you. How can we expect our husband and those around us to change if we are not willing to change ourselves first? “When you pray for your husband, especially in the hopes of changing him, you can surely expect some changes. But the first changes won’t be in him. They’ll be in you. If this makes you as mad as it made me, you’ll say, ‘Wait a minute! I’m not the one that needs changing here!’ But God sees things we don’t. He knows where we have room for improvement.”

In this section, there is something Stormie has said that I really like. In my book, I have it starred because I feel it is a key point, here I am putting in bold. “The most effective tool in transforming your husband may be your own transformation.” Put away the pride and ask God to change you. Ask Him to make you into the wife you need to be, and to show you what areas you need to change. “Your attitude must be, ‘Whatever You want Lord. Show me and I’ll do it.’ It means willing to die to yourself and say, ‘Change me, Lord.’

The Ultimate Love Language

Have you ever read The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman? If not, that is an excellent book as well. In that book it talks about how each person has his or her own love language- the way they show love or like to be shown love. Prayer is the ultimate love language. It is the best way to show that you love your husband even when you don’t want to pray for him, because when we love someone we are willing to do things we don’t want to do. “When you pray for your husband, the love of God will grow in your heart for him Not only that, you’ll find love growing inhis heart for you, without him even knowing you are praying. That’s because prayer is the ultimate love language. It communicates in ways we can’t.”

I Don’t Even Like Him- How Can I Pray for Him?

“Have you ever been so mad at your husband that the last thing you wanted to do was pray for him? So have I. It’s hard to pray for someone when you’re angry or he’s hurt you. But that’s exactly what God wants us to do. But how do we get past the unforgiveness and critical attitude?”

“The first thing to do is be completely honest with God. In order to break down the walls in our hearts and smash the barriers that stop communication, we have to be totally up front with the Lord about our feelings. We don’t have to “pretty it up” for Him. He already knows the truth. He just wants to see if we’re willing to admit it and confess it as disobedience to His ways. If so, He then has a heart with which He can work.”

Have you ever tried to hide things from God? It doesn’t really work does it? It’s funny how we forget that God can see every little thing that we do. So how can we be completely honest with God? “If you are angry at your husband, tell God. Don’t let it become a cancer that grows with each passing day. Say,

‘Lord, nothing in me wants to pray for this man. I confess my anger, hurt, unforgiveness, disappointment, resentment, and hardness of heart toward him. Forgive me and create in me a clean heart and right spirit before You. Give me a new positive attitude toward him. Where he has erred, reveal it to him and convict his heart about it. Lead him through the paths of repentance and deliverance. Help me not to hold myself apart from him emotionally, mentally, or physically because of unforgiveness. Where either of us needs to ask forgiveness of the other, help us do so. If there is something I’m not seeing that is adding to this problem, reveal it to me and help me to understand it. Remove any wedge of confusion that has created misunderstanding or miscommunication. Where there is behavior that needs to change in either of us, I pray You would enable that change to happen. As much as I want to hang on to my anger toward him because I feel it is justified, I want to do what You want. I release all those feelings to You. Give me a renewed sense of love for him and words to heal this situation.’”
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I hope that you still have been remembering to pray for your husband at least 5 minutes a day. Of course you are free to pray more as well, but as I know some are pressed for time, 5 minutes is sometimes all it takes! if your not sure what to pray, this week pray for God to change your heart and to change you. When you are mad at your husband this week pray the prayer above and ask God to help you not to be angry anymore.

Questions:

1. Did you pray for 5 minutes everyday for your husband this past week?

2. Did you find a prayer partner to pray together with?

3. What are some changes you have noticed in yourself or your husband?

For more WONDERFUL writers and topics, visit http://www.wivesoffaith.org/
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I also wanted to leave you with this since it is something that I have been struggling with as well.
Also copied in its entirety from Courtney at http://www.womenlivingwell-courtney.blogspot.com/
She is an awesome christian writer who constantly inspires me!
What to do when life hurts

Today I'm thinking about the reader who is frustrated with her home and feels that it is anything BUT a haven. I turn to Psalm 23 and I think about the inner dialogue of a woman who is hurting...


1 - The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not be in want. (want. want. want. I want...)

2. He makes me lie down (lie down...if only I could lie down for just 20 minutes...if only if only if only) in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters. (quiet. quiet. quiet...this home is so loud...television, ipods, cell phones, chatter, I can't get a moment of quiet here).

3. He restores my soul (my soul. needs. restored. ...it hurts). He guides me in paths of righteousness. (I am so alone...I have no one who understands...if only I had someone to get me out of this mess. mess. mess. Someone besides me please clean up this mess!).

4. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil (what if. what if. what if. what if I'm not enough?) for you are with me (you are? why are you so silent God?); your rod and your staff they comfort me. (comfort. who needs comfort. I am strong. I will pick myself up and press on. I am not weak.)

5. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies, you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. (overflows. overflows. overflows. Dirty dishes overflow, closets overflow, my trash cans overflow, my laundry baskets overflow, my calender overflows...if everything is so full - why do I feel so empty?)

6. Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life. (follow. follow. follow. I feel like difficulties, trials, disappointments, bad relationships and financial problems follow me... goodness? love? follow me?) and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. (put on fake smile. I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever...BUT...I want. I want. I want. if only. if only. if only. my soul hurts. mess. mess. mess. I am weak. no. I am strong. empty. empty. empty.)

Do you hear the self talk? Do you hear what is happening between this woman's two ears? She is saying rotten things to herself about her life, about the people in her life, about her circumstances, and even about God. And then she wonders...why? don't? I? have? peace?

The problem is not out there - it's inside of her. Romans 12:2 says, "Be transformed by the renewing of your mind." Do you want to see a change in your home? It starts in your mind.

The Lord is indeed your Shepherd and you shall not be in want. You must claim these truths. Let him lead you by still waters...are you thirsty? Sit still. Drink a tall glass of his living word! Let him restore your soul. He is with you. He loves you. You will one day dwell in his house forever. You only have one life and living it in the Eeyore state is not living at all!

Are you in a storm? Do you need help? Psalm 121:1 says, "I lift up my eyes to the hills - where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth."

At the core - I am empty, ugly, self-seeking, insecure, questioning myself to death regularly (even cried for about 30 minutes in my husband's office this week over my fears. fears. fears. and failures). I hurt. I struggle. I wrestle. But then - I lift my eyes up to the maker of the heavens and the earth and this world pauses for just a moment and all my ugly thoughts and self talk are washed away by his love, grace and peace. The storms do not disappear but seeing a glimpse of the sunshine that awaits me, lifts me up when I am weak. I am weak. I am weak. He is strong. And so I rest. And he restores.

Blessings for your week!
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Friday, November 5, 2010

Marine Corps Ball Friday.....

1.A different twist on last week’s question. This week, the first question is: what’s the nicest thing a MILSPOUSE has ever done for you? (brought to you from navy_smurfette)

I once had 2 milspouse friends that cleaned my house for me while I was in the hospital with my first baby. (Hubby was deployed.)
2.How often do you drive faster than the speed limit?
On base....NEVER! On the road....most of the time I am going 5 over!
3.Did you have a nickname in school? If so, what was it?
Sebastion, Little J, Jame
4.If your life was a book, what would the title be and how would it end?
This crazy life of mine......happily
5.Look back (in your planner if you have one) to September 14th… what did you do that day?

Friday Fill-ins
So...here we go!

1. Sometimes, I find it hard to control my tongue and temper when surrounded by inconsiderate people.
2. I wish that I could blog about the whole thing.
3. Small minds discuss people. Average minds discuss events. Great minds discuss ideas. (Backwards version of Eleanor Roosevelt quote.)
4. Studying the book of Revelations is very enlightening.
5. I keep meaning to clean this house......
6. I haven't made our Christmas lists ...yet.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to going to the Marine Corps Ball with my handsome hubby, tomorrow my plans include picking the kids up from our friends house, the fall festival at St. Anne's, church & life group and Sunday, I want to get back to my craft fair prep!
 
 

1. If you could have any talent and turn it into an occupation, what would it be?

Photograpy
2. Would you rather have a house at the beach or a cabin in the woods?
Cabin in the woods
3. Is there any meaning or reasoning for the names you chose for your child/children?
Kendall (had a dream about her name and so we chose it.)
Isaac (loved the meaning of it "he will laugh")4. What is your guilty pleasure? (I know we've done this one before, but I'm guessing people's "guilty pleasures" change frequently. At least, mine do!)
The usual....facebook
5. Do you live in a house that is deep cleaned or straightened?
Straightened but I so wish it was deepcleaned!
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Marriage Monday, Making your home a haven, and some thoughts

Thoughts
I wonder. . .

Why I’ve assumed my husband would have such unbelievable faith in me. And why I’ve been so quick to take it for granted.
I wonder. . .
How can I ever thank him for being the Godly man that stands beside me when I need a hand to hold, backs me when I need someone to fall into, and gets down on his knees when I need a lift through his prayers.
I wonder. . .
Do you have a person in your life that is helping you accomplish your dreams? Will you recognize it? How will you thank them?
Exert from Stephanie Bryant
And this really sums up how I feel about Ben and all the support he has given me over the past few months while I have been starting my home business. I am so grateful to have him and all the support that he has always given me. I am working hard on not taking it for granted.
More thoughts
Don’t let people’s compliments go to your head and don’t let their criticisms go to your heart.


To the depth we do either of these things, is to the depth we’ll be ruled by what other people think of us. And boy is it dangerous to build the stability of our identity on the fickle opinions of others.

Each day, let God whisper the truth of who you are and whose you are in your heart and mind. Filter the opinions of others through the reality that just because they think it- doesn’t make it true. Be brave enough to see negative feedback as a possible call to action but not a definition of your identity. And while you enjoy the positive feedback refuse to get bloated by it.

“Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above where Christ is seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things,” (Colossians 3: 1-2).

From Lysa at http://lysaterkeurst.com/2010/11/compliments-and-criticisms/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+LysaTerkeurst+%28Lysa+TerKeurst%29&utm_content=Yahoo%21+Mail
Marriage Monday-Legacy of Love

A lot of people today feel discouraged they don't have much of a legacy to follow when it comes to examples of loving, godly marriages. But many Christians who "walked the aisle" before us carved out a legacy of love we can claim as our own.
 1 Peter 3:3-6

Your adornment must not be merely external--braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands; just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear.
What will you do today to add to the heritage of godly wives?

From Julie at http://comehaveapeace.blogspot.com/
I am working hard at creating a loving and godly marriage so that our children have a blessed legacy of love to carry with them......
Making your home a haven

Week #5 Challenge: Focus on the kitchen, the heart of the home. Cook things with pleasant aromas. Pick a meal the family can cook together - include everyone in a task and take pictures so everyone can remember moments in the kitchen together - test tasting, being creative, laughing and loving. Remove discontentment with your home or family and give thanks to God.


First - let's focus on the spiritual side. Give thanks! In Luke 11:3, Jesus says to pray like this "Give us each day our daily bread." Do we pray and ask God for our daily bread? In America - we are so blessed we rarely have to ask. We should be abundantly thankful for the food we have! Give thanks! Give thanks for your food and give thanks for your family you share it with.

From Courtney at http://womenlivingwell-courtney.blogspot.com/
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Thursday, November 4, 2010

Mama's Song

I am so in love with this Carrie Underwood song.
I heard it 2 or 3 days ago for the first time.
I would have used this for a mother/daughter dance for my wedding had it been out then. (Maybe someday in the FAR off future for Kendall.....)
Love you Mamoo!

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Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday all rolled into one!

Happy Halloween!

Did I not just pledge to maintain this blog better? Did I skip the entire weekend & first 2 days of the week? AHEM ok I am back with pictures galore to satisfy our family and friends!
This weekend was super busy for us. We had dinner with friends on Friday night (to wish one of us a safe & speedy deployment,) Saturday was our last soccer game for Kendall of the season then an adult fall party a little on the hillbilly side. (I am hoping to get some of the pictures soon!) Sunday was spent trying to get caught up!
So here we go.....

Kendall's homemade costume

bobbing for apples
WORDFUL WEDNESDAY

Kendall's sock hop for her class on Friday.
We had such a great time.








For more Wordful Wednesday visit
Wordless Wednesday














Also using these for my Monday Mugs and Mamarazzi Monday!!


Mamarazzi Monday
10 Things to smile about:October
1. The end of the month brings November when I get to see my family!
2. Halloween candy
3. A very successful fashion show for my new business!
4. Fun field trips and parties at Kendall's school.
5. Wonderful discussions with great ladies during bible study
6. FALL!! (My favorite season.)
7. Unseasonably warm temperatures so that we can still play outside in short and t-shirts.
8. Benny starting the painting on our front porch railing. (The little things.....)
9. Hearing from old friends that I had lost touch with....
10. Organizing kids closets

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Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

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