I have done a little research in talking with really good friends and have found that most have a unique story of how their marriage really became "cemented" together.
Now we all know that marriage is meant to be forever and that in our current culture it seems easy to just walk away rather than work through the hard times and heartache.
Ben and I have had some really wonderful times and also some pretty horrible ones as well. I have never questioned that God brought us together for a particular purpose. I am so glad that I let God lead me to the right man instead of "choosing" on my own.
Anyway back to my cement talk, with what was supposed to be my due date for our third child only 2 days away, I have been pretty emotional to say the least. I am so very thankful that Ben has been so steadfast for me through the past 8 months.
I was just sharing with a very close friend and last week with my sister-in-law that I feel like this miscarriage really cemented our marriage together. We have suffered through our hard times & leaned on each other. We have grown through it but I really feel that this experience bonded us together. (And still continues to do so as I am traveling on this road.)
It felt fitting to share a little bit about how I have been coping with the loss of our baby. My parents bought me a ruby ring for Christmas to remember the little one that was to be joining us this month. It is a daily reminder that some day I have a sweet bundle of joy to meet when I greet my maker.
I began to wear it under my wedding set (after speaking with Ben to make sure that he was ok with it) since it did not fit on any other finger & I could not bear to part with it to have it sized. For whatever reason, it just never looked or felt quite right. I was playing with it one day during my quiet time and slipped it on in between my engagement ring and wedding band. It instantly felt so right.
Thus in my mind, our cement being formed and refined. Some days I can look at it and smile knowing that a sweet baby has brought such a love between Ben and I.
And other days I try to be at peace with our current situation because I just might not be meant to understand God's ways.
I pray that some day I will again experience the joy of another pregnancy and baby but until then I am trying to take comfort in God's timing, love, and comfort.
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