1 year ago today....

I woke up at 4:45 a.m. with severe abdominal & back cramps. I knew what was happening even though I tried to will it away. I cried almost the whole way to the ER and a lot of my time in the ER. I was at the Camp Lejeune Naval Hospital praying to hear/see some life on an ultrasound.

Today, I woke up at 4:45 am (no alarm clock and I don't think that it was a coincidence...just God's perfect timing) to little flutter kicks. I spent quiet time in a bath filled with bubbles, I listened to the tall tales of my 2 children, I cried a little bit, I enjoyed feeling this little girl moving inside of me, and I went to Camp Lejeune for an OB check. What perfect music to hear the baby's heartbeat today.

It still hurts but I understand that I am not meant to understand until some glorious day when I meet that little one.

He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. Revelation 21:4